Rebuilding your sense of self after a life-changing diagnosis

A diagnosis can divide life into before and after.

The change may involve pain, surgery, disability, medication, fatigue, uncertainty, altered appearance, or the loss of activities you once took for granted.

It is understandable to grieve that.

But grief and identity are not the same thing.

You are adjusting to a changed life—not becoming a diagnosis

You may need to relearn what your body can do.

You may need different routines.

You may discover new limitations.

You may also discover strengths that weren't previously required.

Let identity become larger, not smaller

You are still:

• funny or serious;
• introverted or outgoing;
• a parent, friend, sibling, professional, artist, gardener, traveler, reader, hunter, cook, musician;
• someone with values, preferences, annoyances, history and plans.

Your diagnosis belongs somewhere in that picture.

It doesn't need to occupy the entire frame.

Confidence can return before certainty

You don't need to know exactly what your health will look like five years from now before living today.

Sometimes confidence means:

"I don't know everything that's coming, but I know more about how I handle difficult things than I used to."